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This is the base Jekyll theme. You can find out more info about customizing your Jekyll theme, as well as basic Jekyll usage documentation at jekyllrb.com
+ +You can find the source code for Minima at GitHub: +jekyll / +minima
+ +You can find the source code for Jekyll at GitHub: +jekyll / +jekyll
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2023 was my year of transitioning from chaotic adventures to habits and routines.
+ +I spent the first half of 2023 continuing my bucket list phase from 2022. A phase where I constantly try new things. Ticking off my childhood dreams one by one .
+ +Whether it’s skydiving, co-piloting, scuba diving, freediving, surfing, windsurfing, glassblowing, sandboarding, snowboarding, or skiing — I tried it all. It was chaotic phase full of spontaneous adventure, but ultimately satisfying.
+ +I ended the phase in July 2023, when I then shifted to a more organized life. I spent the latter part of the year building routines and forming the habits that I want.
+ +Starting a journaling habit was actually the trigger of how this post came to be. I’ve always wanted to write an annual review since years ago but something always stopped me. Journaling and having a clear record of what happened in 2023 makes writing this a lot easier.
+ +++ +Many people think they lack motivation when what they really lack is clarity
+
+— James Clear, Atomic Habits
This review will be structured in 3 sections:
+I will first reflect what went well and what I learned from it. Then, identify what I could improve from things that didn’t go well. Finally, I will share my goals and how I would achieve it for 2024.
+ +In April, I went on a solo trip to Japan and Philippines. I had been aiming to go there specifically because I wanted to tick off my bucket list on snow sports and diving.
+ +The plan was actually almost cancelled after getting ill near the planned date. But I recovered barely in time before winter ends and pushed for the trip. It also means I had to travel during fasting month of Ramadhan, which is an interesting experience by itself (I saved a lot of money on food & had iftaar at Japan mosques).
+ +I had many first experiences in Japan. From experiencing my first snowfall and sakura blossoms, snowboarding and skiing, trying out glassblowing. Seeing so much sand for the first time in sand dune and riding a camel. Yes, sand dune. Not many people know there is a desert in Japan. I even tried sandboarding on the sand dune.
+ +
Some memorable social interactions also happened in the trip. My favorite one was hiking together with a stranger after we helped each other take pictures. We even got a sakura flavored ice cream together at the end!
+ +I learned many things about traveling from the trip:
+I also made many mistakes that became lessons and fond memories now. From sleeping in the airport after missing the last train and finding out it’s not so bad after all. Or dropping off train at the wrong small village, that turns into a nice photoshoot sessions with train tracks and mountains.
+ +I learned to be more comfortable in spontaneity. And to practice the habit of seeing the upsides in misfortune and viewing them as possible lesson and serendipity.
+ +++ +Looking for the positive side of every challenge can become a habit, and so can finding the cloud in every silver lining.
+
+— Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
There were many other anecdotes that’d be too long to include. Instead, you can checkout my Japan trip post for more details on the activities, costs, etc.
+ +After Japan, I went to Cebu in Philippines. My main goals were to swim with the Whale Shark and dive amongst millions of fish in a sardine run. Both were majestic experiences. One left me in awe with the vastness of size and the other with the number of lives swimming around me. I wish to see an even bigger animal like the blue whale one day.
+ +
The trip was also the pivotal moment where I started to really enjoy diving. My previous dives before this was the diving course. I did my diving course in rough weather during monsoon, where I’m constantly stressed with learning the skills in low visibility and rough waves. The dives in the Philippines were the moment where I could truly relax and explore.
+ +Few days after the trip. I celebrated Eid Fitri with my family in Sabang (The Weh Island), Indonesia. A fond memory where my whole family tried diving together with Discover Scuba over there.
+ +Sabang surprisingly has many fish. But the corals suffered a lot due to the tsunami. +There is also an underwater volcano in Sabang. A unique albeit quite underwhelming experience. It’s mainly small holes with bubbles, where the surrounding water are warm.
+ +
Still not satisfied with diving, I went on another diving trip to Perhentian Island where I took Adv + Rescue Diver course.
+ +The course took 1 week and gave me many new diving experience. One of my favorite course was the search & recovery specialization where the instructor hide a small item like a bracelet in the sea, and we are supposed to search it. We also practiced on real situation where we volunteered to search a missing fin by another diver.
+ +Besides that, the roleplay element on the rescue course was also fun. Watching the girls’ distressed acting can be very entertaining. And we also learned CPR and other life saving skills in the course.
+ +While still in the island, I also went on my first night dive which became one of my favorite. I loved the silence during the night. The limited light by the diving torch also makes me fully focus and be present on certain spot.
+ +
Seeing bioluminescence during the night always left me in awe. The first bioluminescence I saw was a cuttlefish with a glowing belly. The second was glowing red and blue planktons swarming our torch light.
+ +Another favorite creature I discovered was ghost shrimps, a shrimp with transparent body. I also encountered many sea creatures that I never see during the day. I remember noticing many sea urchins — and they were moving! The only cons of night diving to me was the blurry videos I got due to the low light.
+ +
My final adventure was a freediving trip in Tenggol island.
+ +I’ve had few classes on freediving in the city and only need to do some final practice on the open water for the certificate. We would swim from the beach a bit far to the sea , with a life buoy on tow. Then we’ll lower down a line from the buoy. The line will be used as assistance when freediving to the bottom. We will take turns freediving one by one. While we take our rest gasping for breaths, the instructor is diving tirelessly for our safety
+ +On my first day, I struggled to equalize my ear. Equalizing your ear means pushing out air from your ear to balance the ear pressure to the water pressure at depth. I had no problem doing this normally, but cannot do so when I’m upside down.
+ +I managed to do it on the second day after using this trick of sucking my nose & mask before equalizing. But I also end up popping blood vessels in my eye and nose by doing so. By sucking the air from my mask air pocket, it also pressurize my mask, which proved to be too much pressure for my blood vessels. Thus, I had bloody eyes and nose after the dive.
+ +
Luckily, there was a doctor amongst the student and he relieved me by saying it’s not fatal and will be gone in few weeks. My eyes continued to be completely blood red for about 2 weeks before it recovers.
+ +Anyway, I was happy I got my Molchanovs freediving cert with my best depth at 15m. Despite the exhausting training during the trip, I find the sport aspect of pushing yourself in freediving and the trip enjoyable. Although I still prefer scuba diving for recreational sea exploration.
+ +Overall, after constantly pushing myself to near-drowning, I definitely become more confident in being underwater.
+ +After all my traveling and diving, I started to run low on money.
+ +I decided that it’s finally enough and I should focus on work again. However, shifting from constantly having fun with novel experiences back to daily grind of work proves to be quite challenging. I end up spending my days on my phone constantly looking for dopamine and barely able to put any work hours in.
+ +I realized I need to restructure my life. Then, I remembered about Atomic Habits. I didn’t apply the book on forming habits previously with the excuse that my life is too chaotic when I constantly try new things and I wanted to experience life full of spontaneity for a while. But now that I ended my bucket list phase, I had no excuse anymore.
+ +So, I started to fully apply the Atomic Habit lessons. Starting with my phone or dopamine addiction.
+ +Make it difficult — I deleted my social media apps.
+ +Make it unattractive — I put my screen time in my home screen, so I’m always reminded how much time I wasted on phone.
+ +Then, I replaced the instant gratification activities with reading non-fiction books. And it worked. Most of my time spent on phone was then spent on reading non-fictions on my kindle instead.
+ +Next, I started forming other basic habits: waking up early & Tahajud prayer, lifting weights, journaling, eating enough calories, and reading before sleep.
+ +Make it easy — I searched for tools I’d enjoy the most and make it the easiest for me. I chose Diarium for journaling.
+ +Keep track of progress — I use Habit Loop for tracking habits, Strava to track running distance, Smashrun for running achievements & statistic, and Rize for time tracking.
+ +
Tracking habits and keeping my streaks was the biggest motivator that kept me consistent with my habits. Despite a few early failures, I was able to keep my habits for about 2-4 weeks.
+ +However, one day after completing a stressful project, I celebrated by playing a game. This became my downfall as I spiraled into binge gaming for about 1 and half months. I couldn’t stop playing Baldur Gate 3 and The Outer Wild once I started it. This was the caveat of streaks, one relapse can easily snowballs to more once I lose my streak.
+ +
After completing the games, I was able to restart my habits again. Thus, I started adding new habits week by week. I had this idea of applying the book I read as a new habit.
+ +For example, I was inspired to run and seek discomfort after reading Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. So I added a habit of doing chores, running, and stretching everyday. And I stacked the habits as part of the morning routine.
+ +Then, I was inspired in donating more after reading Doing Good Better: Effective Altruism. So I started a donation habit. And I did the same for several other books.
+ +In the end, I managed to kept the habits until the end of the year. Which is why I considered as a success. It became easier once I passed the 30+ days streak.
+ +Fitness was the only thing I was able to keep fairly consistent over the full year.
+ +Even during the least productive period or binging sessions, I would still do a short exercise once in 2 week at minimum. Having a home gym equipment like pull-up bar, dumbells, and gymnastic rings were the game changer on making this possible.
+ +It’s about reducing the friction to workout as much as possible. Doing a pull up or a ring dip would only take a few seconds every time I walked around the house.
+ +However, I noticed that my posture is getting worse despite all the exercise I did. I had a slight Anterior Pelvic Tilt (APT). Although prolonged sitting may have affected this, I also suspected muscle imbalance may play a role. I thought so because I didn’t do a full-body balanced workout routine.
+ +My home workout mainly focused on weighted pull ups, with some ring dips, overhead press, and occasional pistol squats on the side. Thus, I have overdeveloped lats, minimal leg muscles, and less developed lower traps and rear delts.
+ +
APT is often associated with weak glutes, tight hip flexors, weak abdominals, and tight back. Although I don’t have severe case of any of them, the combination of my less developed glutes, overdeveloped lats, and my prolonged sitting probably adds up and caused the slight APT.
+ +To fix my posture, I started going to the gym to train deadlift and squat around June.
+ +There is a small local gym near me within 10 min of walking. It used to be too far for me. But I became a lot more comfortable in walking far distance after my trip from Japan. Thus, I had no problem walking to the gym regularly.
+ +Why did I switch to gym? Training legs is quite difficult with just bodyweight. After I can do few pistol squats, I find it hard to progress further. My other calisthenic exercises have also stalled. Weight training on the contrary is a lot easier to progress:
+Despite all that, the main reason that convinced me was because I kept hearing how beneficial deadlift and squat exercises are. Like the testosterone boosts or how functional the movement is.
+ +Anyway, I focused on 3 main lifts in the gym: Deadlift, Squat, Overhead Press, and Row. I also do accessories exercise like face pull & lateral raise at the end of workout.
+ +By the end of the year, my posture improved. I believe it was mainly due to doing deadlift, rows, and face pull as it strengthen my weak muscles — glutes, hamstring, lower back, traps and rear delts.
+ +Here are my best lifts over the year:
+I also successfully gained weight close to my bulking goal. I gained 9kg this year, from 60kg to 69kg. My target was 70kg, with minimal fat gain. So I consider the 90% completion rate as a success.
+ +Besides building muscle, I also started my running streak this year. I was inspired to run everyday after reading Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. I’m aware that running daily without rest day may not be the most optimal for improving my running. However, my goal is more about achieving self-discipline and mental toughness instead of solely improving running. I was inspired by David Goggin’s mental toughness, not his cardio health.
+ +I’m also aware that chance of injury will increase by running everyday. So I made few rules to ensure the intensity is manageable:
+With those rules, I managed to keep a 33 day run streak from 29 Nov until the end of the year.
+ +
I set a goal of writing 1 tech article every month in my medium blog at the start of the year. How much did I write this year? Zero.
+ +Why didn’t I write anything?
+ +I suspect it’s because my interest was more focused on travel and self improvement this year. But, I kept telling myself to write AI or tech articles.
+ +I had gained a small followers on Medium by solely writing tech articles. So I was afraid I’d lose them if I write things on other topics. In the end, I did not write anything.
+ +Now that I think about it, the loss of potential new readers by not writing anything probably exceeds the loss of disappointing my current small followers anyway.
+ +What can I improve in the future?
+Many of my plans and goals started to derail in February.
+ +In that month, I got an unexpected infection that hospitalized me for a few days and required a minor surgery. The doctor left the surgery with an open wound instead of stitching it. So I had to live with the pain of having a gaping wound for a month until it recovers. Simple activities like driving, sitting down, and walking becomes unpleasant, or even painful. To make it worse, I also have to visit a clinic to change the wound dressing, every day.
+ +The unexpected medical issue was a frustrating and humbling experience. Especially since I exercise regularly and thought that I have a fairly healthy lifestyle.
+ +The experience reminds me about the unpredictability of life and to be more grateful. It was a reminder that my plans can be derailed at any moment and that my health is a gift that shouldn’t be taken for granted.
+ +With the medical issue in February and March. I had problem focusing at work with all the discomfort and pain. So I ended my contracted works. Thinking of just restarting the contract or finding new clients altogether once I recover.
+ +Once I recovered and finished my break. I started working again in July. But I spiraled into binge consumption again in September. Only then I realized that the lack of structure in my schedule is negatively affecting my productivity. I’ve entered the situation Jeff Olson described in his book.
+ +++ +Serving as your own boss, and doing so successfully, consistently, day in and day out, takes an uncommon degree of slight edge integrity, and frankly many business owners just don’t have it. They become intoxicated by the freedom of being their own boss and fail to maintain the kind of structure it takes to become successful.
+
+— Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
In summary, I only worked for about 6 months this year. A significant decrease of productivity than last year. I was also quite motivated to try launching a SaaS business this year after reading The Millionaire Fastlane book. Although, I did build few prototypes. I did not ship anything. I lacked the bias for action on top of my productivity issue.
+ +What can I improve in the future?
+My first month was full with social interactions.
+ +I started the new year with a Genting trip with friends to celebrate Marylin’s birthday. We counted down new year, walked around the theme park, played in arcade, tumbled in kids area, and took a lot of photos.
+ +Late in January, I also had my first house visit since secondary school! I went to dinner party in Alina’s house to celebrate Melissa’s birthday. We had boardgames, dinner, dances, and whole lot of fun!
+ +
My social activities stopped when I got ill. I appreciated all my friends that checked in me. But when I’m ill, I like to escape to fantasy land to forget my discomfort.
+ +Thus, I have this tendency to self-isolate and binge on games and books when I’m sick. Having to check my socials and reply to messages just reminds me of the real world. So I tend to reply very late or not at all. Eventually, we just stopped interacting all together as I continued being a hermit even after I recovered.
+ +The fact that I don’t really feel lonely didn’t help my social life either. Once I’ve become used to being alone, it’s hard to start the initiative to socialize again. As shown on this study, chronic social isolation can actually cause anti-social behavior.
+ +In the end, besides my solo trips, I spend the rest of the year mostly staying at home. Although, I think my mental health is fine with my minimal interaction with family. My social skills definitely deteriorated. I know it can’t go on like this. I probably have loss many opportunities because of my lacking social skills and ability to maintain relationship.
+ +What can I improve in the future?
+PS: One fortunate event though was discovering Slowly and trying out pen palling in December. I surprisingly had many enjoyable deep conversation from the app. I loved the delayed long-form messaging and writing long letter. It felt like pair journaling. I also noticed that my writing becomes more structured when I’m writing to someone. So I might even be able to reuse it in my blog later.
+ +My main goals for 2024 is to keep doing my current habits consistently with the year’s theme as self-discipline.
+ +++ +All the information you need is already there. You’re already doing the actions. All you need to do is choose to have them serve and empower you—and keep on choosing
+
+— Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
As the quote says, I think I’ve already known enough on what to do to reach my goals and I may be already doing it. I just need to keep doing it. I should avoid the endless researching trap and actually just do it. Instead, I need more consistency and bias for action for this year.
+ +Like how I spent 2022 reinforcing my identity as adventurous person by constantly trying new thing. I want to reinforce my identity as disciplined person by doing amazing feat of discipline in 2024. As the evidence grow, hopefully so will my identity.
+ +++ +Your identity is not set in stone. You have a choice in every moment. You can choose the identity you want to reinforce today with the habits you choose today.
+
+— James Clear, Atomic Habits
Anyway, here are some of my goals for 2024:
+ +(The way I set goals is I try to set a specific goals with trackable metric and also the a system or daily action to achieve it.)
+ +I realize that it’s a lot of goals and I may need to prioritize. So my main focus would be working, running, reading, and, writing. If I feel overwhelmed at some point, then I may just drop the other goals.
+ + +
A ‘bucket list phase’ is a phase where I try to tick off as many bucket list items as possible in a short time period.
+ +The phase lasted for 1.5 years, and I ticked off about 50+ things in my bucket list. From surfing, skydiving, scuba diving, freediving, co-piloting a plane, dancing, rock climbing, snowboarding, skiing, sandboarding, solo traveling etc.
+ +I had three main reasons - to practice bias for action, to optimize experience, and to be adventurous.
+ +Most people dreams, but only few people actually does things.
+ +This is the common problem with bucket list. We list down big dreams and goals. But it stays as ideas. There can be many things that preventing us from taking action, for examples:
+A bias for action is the ability to overcome all this friction and go into action over inaction.
+ +Increasing the speed between ideas and execution.
+ +++ +Don’t let fear dictate your decisions. Take risks and embrace the unknown. +Bill Perkins, Die With Zero
+
Fortunately, we can actually do something to reduce the uncertainty, fear, overthinking, and procrastination. Thus, improving our bias for action. Here are some ideas:
+ +++ +“Let go of the need for approval from others. Live life on your own terms.” +— Bill Perkins, Die With Zero
+
All of this can be practiced as skills and made into habits. That means we can train ourselves to have bias for action.
+ +So, my solution is to practice all these steps until it becomes ingrained.
+ +I would try to tick off a bucket list item every week. For each goal, I would research on how to do it, then try to do it as soon as possible.
+ +For example, there are many times where I saw an interesting activity ad, add it to my bucket list, booked the earliest possible date, and actually doing it — all in one week, or even a day.
+ +The idea to not delay my ‘bucket list’ anymore came to me after learning about time-bucket concept from the Die with Zero book.
+ +The book argues that certain experience can be better enjoyed at certain period of our life.
+ +Skiing in our 60s might not be as enjoyable as skiing in our 20s with healthy knees. Backpacking might be more suitable while you are young, where you are at similar age with other travelers, more comfortable with discomfort, and may be broke. Luxury travel might be preferred when you are older, richer, and used to luxury.
+ +This is because we have varying life resources (time, money, health) at different part of our life.
+ +
So in order to optimize the benefits and cost from the experiences. We should list all the experience we want to have, and set the best time period to have them based on our resources. This is what we call ‘time-bucketing’ our experiences.
+ +
For me personally, my early adulthood bucketlist would be trying extreme sports, backpacking, and start a business while I’m still young, fit, and have little commitment.
+ +But, everyone’s resources and timeline may be different, so make plans based on your own.
+ +When I started this, I felt like my timing was perfect. I just recently graduated with no other commitment, my freelancing were going well, I have a lot of time and flexibility.
+ +Note that it also doesn’t necessarily mean it’s too late to start something that is better done when you are younger. Time-bucketing is about optimizing your future experience. Doing it late is still better than never doing it at all.
+ +You may also want to consider other factors beside time, money, and health. For example, let’s say a family might not be around in 3-5 years. So you might want to spend more time with them early on. Or if there is a place you want to visit that will be destroyed in a few years. You might want to travel there early even when you don’t have much time at that period.
+ +++ +People often delay their dreams too long until the point where they aren’t even physically capable of doing it anymore.
+
The third reason is because I wanted to be adventurous.
+ +It may have stemmed from my childhood dream of being a polymath. I’ve always wanted to learn and experience everything. My bucket list was full of trying new things.
+ +However, the reality is different. The past 5 years before I started this, I always stuck with programming. It’s likely my fear of looking stupid at trying new things. But I also justified that I need to focus on programming.
+ +Although my focus helped me succeed in programming, it also brings disadvantages. I had a hard time relating with others. Unless we have a common interest in programming, I’d have nothing to talk about and I was too narrow minded to be interested in their interest. My lack of social skills also didn’t help me in asking questions.
+ +I also realized that my narrow focus can cause me to have tunnel vision in my career and programming.
+ +Creative ideas often comes from intersection between two seemingly unrelated areas. A study shows Nobel prize winners are 2.85 times more likely to have artistic or craft hobbies. Many other studies also shows the importance of pastime and diverse interest. Thus, being adventurous and having various experience might actually help me becomes a better researcher or engineer.
+ +So, once I graduated, I decided to be more adventurous.
+ +In order to do that, I followed James Clear’s advice.
+ +++ +Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity. +– James Clear, Atomic Habits
+
Each new thing I tried every week becomes a vote in reinforcing my identity as being adventurous. As the experience and evidence builds up, I’ve become more confident in embodying that identity.
+ +There are few things I did when planning my bucket list phase: setting a time limit to get off the hedonic treadmill and optimizing for new experience rather than new locations.
+ +Use hedonic treadmill to your advantage.
+ +Once your every week is full of thrilling and exciting adventure. Your baseline for happiness will increase. You will keep craving for next novel experience to stay happy. I use this craving as powerful motivator in taking actions for the next goal. However, when uncontrolled, you may end up endlessly seeking new experiences while ignoring other priorities in life.
+ +++ +The world has an effectively infinite number of experiences to offer, so getting a handful of them under your belt brings you no closer to a sense of having feasted on life’s possibilities. Instead, you find yourself pitched straight back into the efficiency trap. The more wonderful experiences you succeed in having, the more additional wonderful experiences you start to feel you could have, or ought to have, on top of all those you’ve already had,
++
+- Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks
+
My solution is to set a time limit.
+ +I decided to spend a year, or at most two years in case of unplanned events. Then, I’d have to focus back on my other priorities.
+ +By setting a short time limit, I’d also have to select bucket list items that can be done in a short time. For example, doing a PhD is not a suitable for this as that would take years. But skydiving, surfing, or diving makes sense as they would only take few days to do.
+ +Be aware though that stopping will be hard. You will feel the craving for dopamine and adventures. But it will pass. Your happiness baseline will eventually return to normal. And you will be able to focus on routine work again. I’d suggest doing a dopamine detox to help reset your baseline.
+ +We often want to travel to experience new things.
+ +However, a new location doesn’t necessarily give an entirely new experience. Some will have fairly similar culture, buildings, language, etc.
+ +Traveling is expensive, so we want to be sure on what new experience we will be getting on the location. Avoid traveling to new country just to post that Instagram picture or so we can tell people that we’re wanderlust.
+ +Instead I’d search for activities I want to try or a specific place I really want to visit. If I can do it locally, I’d do it locally since it’s often cheaper. If not, I’d find the closest place to save the cost.
+ +For example, I can find painting, diving, surfing, or rock climbing class locally. However, I can’t find snow sports, skydiving or shooting range (without needing license). So I went to the closest country where I can do that instead.
+ +My favorite adventurous activity would be diving since it gives you a totally different experience. The way you move, the way you breath, the trees, and the animals are all different than in land.
+ +To give some ideas on what activities you can try, here are what I crossed off in that 1.5 year:
+ +I used to feel envy every time I see the lifestyle influencers showing off their adventurous life like diving, surfing, traveling, etc. Endlessly wondering how it felt like and questioning my own choices.
+ +Now when I see them, I can actually reminisce my own memories, relive them, and be satisfied. At most, I’d just thought, oh I might do that again later.
+ +Of course you can be satisfied with just simple experiences. However, I find it difficult in the digital age when other people best adventures are constantly shoved into your face.
+ +It’s much easier for me to actually just do all these experiences.
+ +Finding a common interest with people is a lot easier if you’ve tried many things.
+ +They would at least have a hobby on things I’ve tried before. I would have the minimal knowledge on the topic to ask questions. And I can share their own excitement and struggle with my own experience. This hopefully help me form relationship faster as shared experience is one of the biggest factor in forming bonds with people.
+ +Although I didn’t have a measured metric, I believe I’ve improved my bias to take action. This doesn’t just mean being impulsive; rather, it’s about thoughtful decisiveness. Instead of merely daydreaming about what could be, I’ve hopefully transitioned into someone who takes concrete steps to make things happen.
+ +It was a gradual process, fueled by each new experience. Every time I checked an item off my list, I reinforced a powerful internal narrative: I am someone who acts on my dreams. This mindset has been transformative, extending beyond adventure-seeking into my professional and personal life.
+ +Moreover, this journey has significantly broadened my openness to new experiences. Previously, I might have hesitated or outright refused certain opportunities due to fear or uncertainty. Now, I find myself more willing to embrace unfamiliar situations. This isn’t recklessness; it’s a newfound appreciation for the richness and diversity of life’s experiences.
+ +One significant challenge was the planning and coordination required for each activity while still working to finance my activities. I had to put less focus on my career, taking less projects and working less hours to have the time do all my activities.
+ +There were times when I felt overwhelmed. Juggling multiple activities, along with my regular responsibilities. However, these challenges were integral to the learning process, teaching me valuable lessons in time management, resilience, and the importance of rest and recovery.
+ +Reflecting on this phase, I realize that I’ve not only accumulated a wealth of experiences but also grown immensely as a person. My perspectives have broadened, and my approach to life has become more proactive and dynamic.
+ +As I move forward, my focus will shift slightly.
+ +While I’ll continue to embrace new experiences, I also plan to delve deeper into a few select areas. This means potentially revisiting some past activities and honing my skills further, be it in a particular sport, art form, or any other domain that piqued my interest.
+ +If you’re considering embarking on your own bucket list journey, my advice is to start small and gradually expand your horizons. It’s not about ticking off a list for the sake of it, but about the growth and joy that comes from these experiences.
+ +Remember, it’s never too late to start. Whether you’re in your 20s, 40s, or even older, there’s a world of experiences waiting for you. So, what’s on your bucket list? Start planning, set achievable goals, and most importantly, take action. Your future self will thank you for the memories, skills, and growth that come from living a life full of adventure and learning.
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+ + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/deploy b/deploy new file mode 100755 index 0000000..c1e37a3 --- /dev/null +++ b/deploy @@ -0,0 +1,59 @@ +#!/bin/bash + +# Stop on error +set -e +# Fail on pipe errors +set -o pipefail + +# Variables +BRANCH="gh-pages" +BRANCH_FROM="master" +DEPLOY_CONFIG="_config-deploy.yml" + +# Get the current Git repository URL +URL=$(git config --get remote.origin.url) +if [ -z "$URL" ]; then + echo "Error: Not a Git repository or no remote set." + exit 1 +fi + +# Get the current working directory as the source +SRC=$(pwd) + +# Create a temporary directory +TEMP=$(mktemp -d -t jgd-XXX) + +# Function to clean up temporary directory on exit +function cleanup { + rm -rf "$TEMP" +} +trap cleanup EXIT + +# Clone and copy directories +CLONE="$TEMP/clone" +# echo -e 'Cloning Github repository:' +# git clone -b "$BRANCH_FROM" "$URL" "$CLONE" + +# Build Jekyll site + +echo -e '\nBuilding Jekyll site:' +# rm -rf _site +if [ -r "$SRC/$DEPLOY_CONFIG" ]; then + bundle exec jekyll build --config "$SRC/$DEPLOY_CONFIG" +else + bundle exec jekyll build +fi + +cp -r _site "$CLONE" +cd "$CLONE" + +# Push _site to gh-pages branch +touch .nojekyll +git init +git remote add origin "$URL" +git checkout -b "$BRANCH" +git add . +git commit -m "Deploy Jekyll site" +git push -u origin "$BRANCH" --force + +# echo "Jekyll site deployed to $BRANCH branch." \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/favicon.png b/favicon.png new file mode 100644 index 0000000..01abb46 Binary files /dev/null and b/favicon.png differ diff --git a/feed.xml b/feed.xml new file mode 100644 index 0000000..757a0b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/feed.xml @@ -0,0 +1,665 @@ +
A ‘bucket list phase’ is a phase where I try to tick off as many bucket list items as possible in a short time period.
+ +The phase lasted for 1.5 years, and I ticked off about 50+ things in my bucket list. From surfing, skydiving, scuba diving, freediving, co-piloting a plane, dancing, rock climbing, snowboarding, skiing, sandboarding, solo traveling etc.
+ +I had three main reasons - to practice bias for action, to optimize experience, and to be adventurous.
+ +Most people dreams, but only few people actually does things.
+ +This is the common problem with bucket list. We list down big dreams and goals. But it stays as ideas. There can be many things that preventing us from taking action, for examples:
+A bias for action is the ability to overcome all this friction and go into action over inaction.
+ +Increasing the speed between ideas and execution.
+ +++ +Don’t let fear dictate your decisions. Take risks and embrace the unknown. +Bill Perkins, Die With Zero
+
Fortunately, we can actually do something to reduce the uncertainty, fear, overthinking, and procrastination. Thus, improving our bias for action. Here are some ideas:
+ +++ +“Let go of the need for approval from others. Live life on your own terms.” +— Bill Perkins, Die With Zero
+
All of this can be practiced as skills and made into habits. That means we can train ourselves to have bias for action.
+ +So, my solution is to practice all these steps until it becomes ingrained.
+ +I would try to tick off a bucket list item every week. For each goal, I would research on how to do it, then try to do it as soon as possible.
+ +For example, there are many times where I saw an interesting activity ad, add it to my bucket list, booked the earliest possible date, and actually doing it — all in one week, or even a day.
+ +The idea to not delay my ‘bucket list’ anymore came to me after learning about time-bucket concept from the Die with Zero book.
+ +The book argues that certain experience can be better enjoyed at certain period of our life.
+ +Skiing in our 60s might not be as enjoyable as skiing in our 20s with healthy knees. Backpacking might be more suitable while you are young, where you are at similar age with other travelers, more comfortable with discomfort, and may be broke. Luxury travel might be preferred when you are older, richer, and used to luxury.
+ +This is because we have varying life resources (time, money, health) at different part of our life.
+ +
So in order to optimize the benefits and cost from the experiences. We should list all the experience we want to have, and set the best time period to have them based on our resources. This is what we call ‘time-bucketing’ our experiences.
+ +
For me personally, my early adulthood bucketlist would be trying extreme sports, backpacking, and start a business while I’m still young, fit, and have little commitment.
+ +But, everyone’s resources and timeline may be different, so make plans based on your own.
+ +When I started this, I felt like my timing was perfect. I just recently graduated with no other commitment, my freelancing were going well, I have a lot of time and flexibility.
+ +Note that it also doesn’t necessarily mean it’s too late to start something that is better done when you are younger. Time-bucketing is about optimizing your future experience. Doing it late is still better than never doing it at all.
+ +You may also want to consider other factors beside time, money, and health. For example, let’s say a family might not be around in 3-5 years. So you might want to spend more time with them early on. Or if there is a place you want to visit that will be destroyed in a few years. You might want to travel there early even when you don’t have much time at that period.
+ +++ +People often delay their dreams too long until the point where they aren’t even physically capable of doing it anymore.
+
The third reason is because I wanted to be adventurous.
+ +It may have stemmed from my childhood dream of being a polymath. I’ve always wanted to learn and experience everything. My bucket list was full of trying new things.
+ +However, the reality is different. The past 5 years before I started this, I always stuck with programming. It’s likely my fear of looking stupid at trying new things. But I also justified that I need to focus on programming.
+ +Although my focus helped me succeed in programming, it also brings disadvantages. I had a hard time relating with others. Unless we have a common interest in programming, I’d have nothing to talk about and I was too narrow minded to be interested in their interest. My lack of social skills also didn’t help me in asking questions.
+ +I also realized that my narrow focus can cause me to have tunnel vision in my career and programming.
+ +Creative ideas often comes from intersection between two seemingly unrelated areas. A study shows Nobel prize winners are 2.85 times more likely to have artistic or craft hobbies. Many other studies also shows the importance of pastime and diverse interest. Thus, being adventurous and having various experience might actually help me becomes a better researcher or engineer.
+ +So, once I graduated, I decided to be more adventurous.
+ +In order to do that, I followed James Clear’s advice.
+ +++ +Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity. +– James Clear, Atomic Habits
+
Each new thing I tried every week becomes a vote in reinforcing my identity as being adventurous. As the experience and evidence builds up, I’ve become more confident in embodying that identity.
+ +There are few things I did when planning my bucket list phase: setting a time limit to get off the hedonic treadmill and optimizing for new experience rather than new locations.
+ +Use hedonic treadmill to your advantage.
+ +Once your every week is full of thrilling and exciting adventure. Your baseline for happiness will increase. You will keep craving for next novel experience to stay happy. I use this craving as powerful motivator in taking actions for the next goal. However, when uncontrolled, you may end up endlessly seeking new experiences while ignoring other priorities in life.
+ +++ +The world has an effectively infinite number of experiences to offer, so getting a handful of them under your belt brings you no closer to a sense of having feasted on life’s possibilities. Instead, you find yourself pitched straight back into the efficiency trap. The more wonderful experiences you succeed in having, the more additional wonderful experiences you start to feel you could have, or ought to have, on top of all those you’ve already had,
++
+- Oliver Burkeman, Four Thousand Weeks
+
My solution is to set a time limit.
+ +I decided to spend a year, or at most two years in case of unplanned events. Then, I’d have to focus back on my other priorities.
+ +By setting a short time limit, I’d also have to select bucket list items that can be done in a short time. For example, doing a PhD is not a suitable for this as that would take years. But skydiving, surfing, or diving makes sense as they would only take few days to do.
+ +Be aware though that stopping will be hard. You will feel the craving for dopamine and adventures. But it will pass. Your happiness baseline will eventually return to normal. And you will be able to focus on routine work again. I’d suggest doing a dopamine detox to help reset your baseline.
+ +We often want to travel to experience new things.
+ +However, a new location doesn’t necessarily give an entirely new experience. Some will have fairly similar culture, buildings, language, etc.
+ +Traveling is expensive, so we want to be sure on what new experience we will be getting on the location. Avoid traveling to new country just to post that Instagram picture or so we can tell people that we’re wanderlust.
+ +Instead I’d search for activities I want to try or a specific place I really want to visit. If I can do it locally, I’d do it locally since it’s often cheaper. If not, I’d find the closest place to save the cost.
+ +For example, I can find painting, diving, surfing, or rock climbing class locally. However, I can’t find snow sports, skydiving or shooting range (without needing license). So I went to the closest country where I can do that instead.
+ +My favorite adventurous activity would be diving since it gives you a totally different experience. The way you move, the way you breath, the trees, and the animals are all different than in land.
+ +To give some ideas on what activities you can try, here are what I crossed off in that 1.5 year:
+ +I used to feel envy every time I see the lifestyle influencers showing off their adventurous life like diving, surfing, traveling, etc. Endlessly wondering how it felt like and questioning my own choices.
+ +Now when I see them, I can actually reminisce my own memories, relive them, and be satisfied. At most, I’d just thought, oh I might do that again later.
+ +Of course you can be satisfied with just simple experiences. However, I find it difficult in the digital age when other people best adventures are constantly shoved into your face.
+ +It’s much easier for me to actually just do all these experiences.
+ +Finding a common interest with people is a lot easier if you’ve tried many things.
+ +They would at least have a hobby on things I’ve tried before. I would have the minimal knowledge on the topic to ask questions. And I can share their own excitement and struggle with my own experience. This hopefully help me form relationship faster as shared experience is one of the biggest factor in forming bonds with people.
+ +Although I didn’t have a measured metric, I believe I’ve improved my bias to take action. This doesn’t just mean being impulsive; rather, it’s about thoughtful decisiveness. Instead of merely daydreaming about what could be, I’ve hopefully transitioned into someone who takes concrete steps to make things happen.
+ +It was a gradual process, fueled by each new experience. Every time I checked an item off my list, I reinforced a powerful internal narrative: I am someone who acts on my dreams. This mindset has been transformative, extending beyond adventure-seeking into my professional and personal life.
+ +Moreover, this journey has significantly broadened my openness to new experiences. Previously, I might have hesitated or outright refused certain opportunities due to fear or uncertainty. Now, I find myself more willing to embrace unfamiliar situations. This isn’t recklessness; it’s a newfound appreciation for the richness and diversity of life’s experiences.
+ +One significant challenge was the planning and coordination required for each activity while still working to finance my activities. I had to put less focus on my career, taking less projects and working less hours to have the time do all my activities.
+ +There were times when I felt overwhelmed. Juggling multiple activities, along with my regular responsibilities. However, these challenges were integral to the learning process, teaching me valuable lessons in time management, resilience, and the importance of rest and recovery.
+ +Reflecting on this phase, I realize that I’ve not only accumulated a wealth of experiences but also grown immensely as a person. My perspectives have broadened, and my approach to life has become more proactive and dynamic.
+ +As I move forward, my focus will shift slightly.
+ +While I’ll continue to embrace new experiences, I also plan to delve deeper into a few select areas. This means potentially revisiting some past activities and honing my skills further, be it in a particular sport, art form, or any other domain that piqued my interest.
+ +If you’re considering embarking on your own bucket list journey, my advice is to start small and gradually expand your horizons. It’s not about ticking off a list for the sake of it, but about the growth and joy that comes from these experiences.
+ +Remember, it’s never too late to start. Whether you’re in your 20s, 40s, or even older, there’s a world of experiences waiting for you. So, what’s on your bucket list? Start planning, set achievable goals, and most importantly, take action. Your future self will thank you for the memories, skills, and growth that come from living a life full of adventure and learning.
]]>
2023 was my year of transitioning from chaotic adventures to habits and routines.
+ +I spent the first half of 2023 continuing my bucket list phase from 2022. A phase where I constantly try new things. Ticking off my childhood dreams one by one .
+ +Whether it’s skydiving, co-piloting, scuba diving, freediving, surfing, windsurfing, glassblowing, sandboarding, snowboarding, or skiing — I tried it all. It was chaotic phase full of spontaneous adventure, but ultimately satisfying.
+ +I ended the phase in July 2023, when I then shifted to a more organized life. I spent the latter part of the year building routines and forming the habits that I want.
+ +Starting a journaling habit was actually the trigger of how this post came to be. I’ve always wanted to write an annual review since years ago but something always stopped me. Journaling and having a clear record of what happened in 2023 makes writing this a lot easier.
+ +++ +Many people think they lack motivation when what they really lack is clarity
+
+— James Clear, Atomic Habits
This review will be structured in 3 sections:
+I will first reflect what went well and what I learned from it. Then, identify what I could improve from things that didn’t go well. Finally, I will share my goals and how I would achieve it for 2024.
+ +In April, I went on a solo trip to Japan and Philippines. I had been aiming to go there specifically because I wanted to tick off my bucket list on snow sports and diving.
+ +The plan was actually almost cancelled after getting ill near the planned date. But I recovered barely in time before winter ends and pushed for the trip. It also means I had to travel during fasting month of Ramadhan, which is an interesting experience by itself (I saved a lot of money on food & had iftaar at Japan mosques).
+ +I had many first experiences in Japan. From experiencing my first snowfall and sakura blossoms, snowboarding and skiing, trying out glassblowing. Seeing so much sand for the first time in sand dune and riding a camel. Yes, sand dune. Not many people know there is a desert in Japan. I even tried sandboarding on the sand dune.
+ +
Some memorable social interactions also happened in the trip. My favorite one was hiking together with a stranger after we helped each other take pictures. We even got a sakura flavored ice cream together at the end!
+ +I learned many things about traveling from the trip:
+I also made many mistakes that became lessons and fond memories now. From sleeping in the airport after missing the last train and finding out it’s not so bad after all. Or dropping off train at the wrong small village, that turns into a nice photoshoot sessions with train tracks and mountains.
+ +I learned to be more comfortable in spontaneity. And to practice the habit of seeing the upsides in misfortune and viewing them as possible lesson and serendipity.
+ +++ +Looking for the positive side of every challenge can become a habit, and so can finding the cloud in every silver lining.
+
+— Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
There were many other anecdotes that’d be too long to include. Instead, you can checkout my Japan trip post for more details on the activities, costs, etc.
+ +After Japan, I went to Cebu in Philippines. My main goals were to swim with the Whale Shark and dive amongst millions of fish in a sardine run. Both were majestic experiences. One left me in awe with the vastness of size and the other with the number of lives swimming around me. I wish to see an even bigger animal like the blue whale one day.
+ +
The trip was also the pivotal moment where I started to really enjoy diving. My previous dives before this was the diving course. I did my diving course in rough weather during monsoon, where I’m constantly stressed with learning the skills in low visibility and rough waves. The dives in the Philippines were the moment where I could truly relax and explore.
+ +Few days after the trip. I celebrated Eid Fitri with my family in Sabang (The Weh Island), Indonesia. A fond memory where my whole family tried diving together with Discover Scuba over there.
+ +Sabang surprisingly has many fish. But the corals suffered a lot due to the tsunami. +There is also an underwater volcano in Sabang. A unique albeit quite underwhelming experience. It’s mainly small holes with bubbles, where the surrounding water are warm.
+ +
Still not satisfied with diving, I went on another diving trip to Perhentian Island where I took Adv + Rescue Diver course.
+ +The course took 1 week and gave me many new diving experience. One of my favorite course was the search & recovery specialization where the instructor hide a small item like a bracelet in the sea, and we are supposed to search it. We also practiced on real situation where we volunteered to search a missing fin by another diver.
+ +Besides that, the roleplay element on the rescue course was also fun. Watching the girls’ distressed acting can be very entertaining. And we also learned CPR and other life saving skills in the course.
+ +While still in the island, I also went on my first night dive which became one of my favorite. I loved the silence during the night. The limited light by the diving torch also makes me fully focus and be present on certain spot.
+ +
Seeing bioluminescence during the night always left me in awe. The first bioluminescence I saw was a cuttlefish with a glowing belly. The second was glowing red and blue planktons swarming our torch light.
+ +Another favorite creature I discovered was ghost shrimps, a shrimp with transparent body. I also encountered many sea creatures that I never see during the day. I remember noticing many sea urchins — and they were moving! The only cons of night diving to me was the blurry videos I got due to the low light.
+ +
My final adventure was a freediving trip in Tenggol island.
+ +I’ve had few classes on freediving in the city and only need to do some final practice on the open water for the certificate. We would swim from the beach a bit far to the sea , with a life buoy on tow. Then we’ll lower down a line from the buoy. The line will be used as assistance when freediving to the bottom. We will take turns freediving one by one. While we take our rest gasping for breaths, the instructor is diving tirelessly for our safety
+ +On my first day, I struggled to equalize my ear. Equalizing your ear means pushing out air from your ear to balance the ear pressure to the water pressure at depth. I had no problem doing this normally, but cannot do so when I’m upside down.
+ +I managed to do it on the second day after using this trick of sucking my nose & mask before equalizing. But I also end up popping blood vessels in my eye and nose by doing so. By sucking the air from my mask air pocket, it also pressurize my mask, which proved to be too much pressure for my blood vessels. Thus, I had bloody eyes and nose after the dive.
+ +
Luckily, there was a doctor amongst the student and he relieved me by saying it’s not fatal and will be gone in few weeks. My eyes continued to be completely blood red for about 2 weeks before it recovers.
+ +Anyway, I was happy I got my Molchanovs freediving cert with my best depth at 15m. Despite the exhausting training during the trip, I find the sport aspect of pushing yourself in freediving and the trip enjoyable. Although I still prefer scuba diving for recreational sea exploration.
+ +Overall, after constantly pushing myself to near-drowning, I definitely become more confident in being underwater.
+ +After all my traveling and diving, I started to run low on money.
+ +I decided that it’s finally enough and I should focus on work again. However, shifting from constantly having fun with novel experiences back to daily grind of work proves to be quite challenging. I end up spending my days on my phone constantly looking for dopamine and barely able to put any work hours in.
+ +I realized I need to restructure my life. Then, I remembered about Atomic Habits. I didn’t apply the book on forming habits previously with the excuse that my life is too chaotic when I constantly try new things and I wanted to experience life full of spontaneity for a while. But now that I ended my bucket list phase, I had no excuse anymore.
+ +So, I started to fully apply the Atomic Habit lessons. Starting with my phone or dopamine addiction.
+ +Make it difficult — I deleted my social media apps.
+ +Make it unattractive — I put my screen time in my home screen, so I’m always reminded how much time I wasted on phone.
+ +Then, I replaced the instant gratification activities with reading non-fiction books. And it worked. Most of my time spent on phone was then spent on reading non-fictions on my kindle instead.
+ +Next, I started forming other basic habits: waking up early & Tahajud prayer, lifting weights, journaling, eating enough calories, and reading before sleep.
+ +Make it easy — I searched for tools I’d enjoy the most and make it the easiest for me. I chose Diarium for journaling.
+ +Keep track of progress — I use Habit Loop for tracking habits, Strava to track running distance, Smashrun for running achievements & statistic, and Rize for time tracking.
+ +
Tracking habits and keeping my streaks was the biggest motivator that kept me consistent with my habits. Despite a few early failures, I was able to keep my habits for about 2-4 weeks.
+ +However, one day after completing a stressful project, I celebrated by playing a game. This became my downfall as I spiraled into binge gaming for about 1 and half months. I couldn’t stop playing Baldur Gate 3 and The Outer Wild once I started it. This was the caveat of streaks, one relapse can easily snowballs to more once I lose my streak.
+ +
After completing the games, I was able to restart my habits again. Thus, I started adding new habits week by week. I had this idea of applying the book I read as a new habit.
+ +For example, I was inspired to run and seek discomfort after reading Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. So I added a habit of doing chores, running, and stretching everyday. And I stacked the habits as part of the morning routine.
+ +Then, I was inspired in donating more after reading Doing Good Better: Effective Altruism. So I started a donation habit. And I did the same for several other books.
+ +In the end, I managed to kept the habits until the end of the year. Which is why I considered as a success. It became easier once I passed the 30+ days streak.
+ +Fitness was the only thing I was able to keep fairly consistent over the full year.
+ +Even during the least productive period or binging sessions, I would still do a short exercise once in 2 week at minimum. Having a home gym equipment like pull-up bar, dumbells, and gymnastic rings were the game changer on making this possible.
+ +It’s about reducing the friction to workout as much as possible. Doing a pull up or a ring dip would only take a few seconds every time I walked around the house.
+ +However, I noticed that my posture is getting worse despite all the exercise I did. I had a slight Anterior Pelvic Tilt (APT). Although prolonged sitting may have affected this, I also suspected muscle imbalance may play a role. I thought so because I didn’t do a full-body balanced workout routine.
+ +My home workout mainly focused on weighted pull ups, with some ring dips, overhead press, and occasional pistol squats on the side. Thus, I have overdeveloped lats, minimal leg muscles, and less developed lower traps and rear delts.
+ +
APT is often associated with weak glutes, tight hip flexors, weak abdominals, and tight back. Although I don’t have severe case of any of them, the combination of my less developed glutes, overdeveloped lats, and my prolonged sitting probably adds up and caused the slight APT.
+ +To fix my posture, I started going to the gym to train deadlift and squat around June.
+ +There is a small local gym near me within 10 min of walking. It used to be too far for me. But I became a lot more comfortable in walking far distance after my trip from Japan. Thus, I had no problem walking to the gym regularly.
+ +Why did I switch to gym? Training legs is quite difficult with just bodyweight. After I can do few pistol squats, I find it hard to progress further. My other calisthenic exercises have also stalled. Weight training on the contrary is a lot easier to progress:
+Despite all that, the main reason that convinced me was because I kept hearing how beneficial deadlift and squat exercises are. Like the testosterone boosts or how functional the movement is.
+ +Anyway, I focused on 3 main lifts in the gym: Deadlift, Squat, Overhead Press, and Row. I also do accessories exercise like face pull & lateral raise at the end of workout.
+ +By the end of the year, my posture improved. I believe it was mainly due to doing deadlift, rows, and face pull as it strengthen my weak muscles — glutes, hamstring, lower back, traps and rear delts.
+ +Here are my best lifts over the year:
+I also successfully gained weight close to my bulking goal. I gained 9kg this year, from 60kg to 69kg. My target was 70kg, with minimal fat gain. So I consider the 90% completion rate as a success.
+ +Besides building muscle, I also started my running streak this year. I was inspired to run everyday after reading Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. I’m aware that running daily without rest day may not be the most optimal for improving my running. However, my goal is more about achieving self-discipline and mental toughness instead of solely improving running. I was inspired by David Goggin’s mental toughness, not his cardio health.
+ +I’m also aware that chance of injury will increase by running everyday. So I made few rules to ensure the intensity is manageable:
+With those rules, I managed to keep a 33 day run streak from 29 Nov until the end of the year.
+ +
I set a goal of writing 1 tech article every month in my medium blog at the start of the year. How much did I write this year? Zero.
+ +Why didn’t I write anything?
+ +I suspect it’s because my interest was more focused on travel and self improvement this year. But, I kept telling myself to write AI or tech articles.
+ +I had gained a small followers on Medium by solely writing tech articles. So I was afraid I’d lose them if I write things on other topics. In the end, I did not write anything.
+ +Now that I think about it, the loss of potential new readers by not writing anything probably exceeds the loss of disappointing my current small followers anyway.
+ +What can I improve in the future?
+Many of my plans and goals started to derail in February.
+ +In that month, I got an unexpected infection that hospitalized me for a few days and required a minor surgery. The doctor left the surgery with an open wound instead of stitching it. So I had to live with the pain of having a gaping wound for a month until it recovers. Simple activities like driving, sitting down, and walking becomes unpleasant, or even painful. To make it worse, I also have to visit a clinic to change the wound dressing, every day.
+ +The unexpected medical issue was a frustrating and humbling experience. Especially since I exercise regularly and thought that I have a fairly healthy lifestyle.
+ +The experience reminds me about the unpredictability of life and to be more grateful. It was a reminder that my plans can be derailed at any moment and that my health is a gift that shouldn’t be taken for granted.
+ +With the medical issue in February and March. I had problem focusing at work with all the discomfort and pain. So I ended my contracted works. Thinking of just restarting the contract or finding new clients altogether once I recover.
+ +Once I recovered and finished my break. I started working again in July. But I spiraled into binge consumption again in September. Only then I realized that the lack of structure in my schedule is negatively affecting my productivity. I’ve entered the situation Jeff Olson described in his book.
+ +++ +Serving as your own boss, and doing so successfully, consistently, day in and day out, takes an uncommon degree of slight edge integrity, and frankly many business owners just don’t have it. They become intoxicated by the freedom of being their own boss and fail to maintain the kind of structure it takes to become successful.
+
+— Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
In summary, I only worked for about 6 months this year. A significant decrease of productivity than last year. I was also quite motivated to try launching a SaaS business this year after reading The Millionaire Fastlane book. Although, I did build few prototypes. I did not ship anything. I lacked the bias for action on top of my productivity issue.
+ +What can I improve in the future?
+My first month was full with social interactions.
+ +I started the new year with a Genting trip with friends to celebrate Marylin’s birthday. We counted down new year, walked around the theme park, played in arcade, tumbled in kids area, and took a lot of photos.
+ +Late in January, I also had my first house visit since secondary school! I went to dinner party in Alina’s house to celebrate Melissa’s birthday. We had boardgames, dinner, dances, and whole lot of fun!
+ +
My social activities stopped when I got ill. I appreciated all my friends that checked in me. But when I’m ill, I like to escape to fantasy land to forget my discomfort.
+ +Thus, I have this tendency to self-isolate and binge on games and books when I’m sick. Having to check my socials and reply to messages just reminds me of the real world. So I tend to reply very late or not at all. Eventually, we just stopped interacting all together as I continued being a hermit even after I recovered.
+ +The fact that I don’t really feel lonely didn’t help my social life either. Once I’ve become used to being alone, it’s hard to start the initiative to socialize again. As shown on this study, chronic social isolation can actually cause anti-social behavior.
+ +In the end, besides my solo trips, I spend the rest of the year mostly staying at home. Although, I think my mental health is fine with my minimal interaction with family. My social skills definitely deteriorated. I know it can’t go on like this. I probably have loss many opportunities because of my lacking social skills and ability to maintain relationship.
+ +What can I improve in the future?
+PS: One fortunate event though was discovering Slowly and trying out pen palling in December. I surprisingly had many enjoyable deep conversation from the app. I loved the delayed long-form messaging and writing long letter. It felt like pair journaling. I also noticed that my writing becomes more structured when I’m writing to someone. So I might even be able to reuse it in my blog later.
+ +My main goals for 2024 is to keep doing my current habits consistently with the year’s theme as self-discipline.
+ +++ +All the information you need is already there. You’re already doing the actions. All you need to do is choose to have them serve and empower you—and keep on choosing
+
+— Jeff Olson, The Slight Edge
As the quote says, I think I’ve already known enough on what to do to reach my goals and I may be already doing it. I just need to keep doing it. I should avoid the endless researching trap and actually just do it. Instead, I need more consistency and bias for action for this year.
+ +Like how I spent 2022 reinforcing my identity as adventurous person by constantly trying new thing. I want to reinforce my identity as disciplined person by doing amazing feat of discipline in 2024. As the evidence grow, hopefully so will my identity.
+ +++ +Your identity is not set in stone. You have a choice in every moment. You can choose the identity you want to reinforce today with the habits you choose today.
+
+— James Clear, Atomic Habits
Anyway, here are some of my goals for 2024:
+ +(The way I set goals is I try to set a specific goals with trackable metric and also the a system or daily action to achieve it.)
+ +I realize that it’s a lot of goals and I may need to prioritize. So my main focus would be working, running, reading, and, writing. If I feel overwhelmed at some point, then I may just drop the other goals.
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+ I'm a fullstack developer and ML engineer specializing in generative AI and computer vision. I co-authored a research paper with MIT in generative AI when I was 19 and worked in generative AI projects since then. I'm also a certified freediver and PADI rescue diver. I run, weightlift, climb, and write as a hobby.
+
At 15 years old, I skipped highschool and entered university as the youngest student.
+
At 17, I was the youngest software engineering intern at Fave and started f...
+ ● Freelancer/Contractor as ML Engineer specializing in Generative AI.
● Worked with individuals and companies internationally, including Idea Ink, JericVerse, Axentra Group, and Garven Labs.
● Python, PyTorch, React, Vercel, Gradio, Paypal API, Stripe API
+
+ ● Co-authored 'CreativeGAN' conference paper for ASME IDETC-CIE with MIT DeCoDE Lab.
● Trained segmentation, generative, and novelty detection networks on a new dataset and integrated the networks for creative bike design synthesis.
● Python, Tensorflow, PyTorch, OpenCV, High-Performance Computing (HPC)
+
Bucket List Phase: Practicing Bias for Action in Adventures
+ 15/01/2024 + + + +My Annual Review 2023: Travel & Habits
+ 11/01/2024 + + +A detailed, step-by-step write-up on how I built Text2Art.com +
+Learn how to train an AI to generate any images you want +
+Sneak peek into the future of digital arts +
+Clothing semantic editing for fashion design using StyleGAN and GANSpace +
+
+ Rashad worked as a software developer intern in my team in Fave . His responsibilities were requirements gathering, analysis, design of features, fixing bugs and improving some parts of our codebase. During the course of his internship, he proved himself to be a fast learner. I was always impressed by his pull request descriptions. I found it very clear and it gave me enough context to understand what he was working on. He solves problems on his own and asks for feedback on how he can improve his skills in software development. With the right guidance, I'm pretty sure that he is going to be successful as a software developer.+
Engineering Lead, Fave
+15/11/2021 - Fathy Rashad: A Self-Starter Who Creates Opportunities for Himself - UTP
+ + + +10/11/2021 - Hard work pays off - The Star
+ + + +01/11/2021 - 문장 입력하면 ‘그림 완성’ 인공지능 신세계 연다 - Hankyoreh
+ + + +30/10/2021 - UTP undergrad publishes joint conference paper with MIT - The Borneo Post
+ + + +17/10/2021 - UTP學生姆哈末法迪國際工程^支術會議發表論文 - Sin Chew Media Corporation
+ + + +30/09/2021 - UTP Computer Engineering student publishes paper with MIT - BERNAMA
+ + + +03/01/2020 - Robot Design Handbook, Robocon Malaysia, 2019, Page 265 - IIUM PRESS
+ + +
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